Monday, December 3, 2018

A 7 Year Old's Impression ... My Memory of 41

Being President of the United States gives a few lucky men the opportunity to influence so many youth on a mass scale. In a time when the country is now mourning the loss of 41, everyone is in a state of reflection. I’m no different. I don’t remember President Regan even though he was the president when I was born. President Bush was the first that I actually remember. And remembering him is one of the memories I have as a young child that sticks out most vividly in my mind.

There are few others like the birth of my brother, the Challenger exploding, Reading Rainbow in 1st grade and then, President Bush addressing the nation.

I can’t remember if I was flying to Houston or flying home from Houston, but I remember President Bush. I was at the airport with my mom sitting with our luggage in Kansas City when President Bush was on the television. I remember looking up and seeing him talking to the nation. I don’t remember what it was about, maybe the Gulf War given the time period. But I remember him, and the Seal of the United States. As a young girl I was awe struck by the sight. Here was a man, powerful, strong, and capturing.

It was in that very moment that a young 7 (maybe I was 8) girl decided she was going to be a lawyer and then one day President herself. From that moment on every decision I made was with the goal of serving my country in politics. And it was a goal I intended to keep.

But like every dream of a young kid, life changes in college. I took a Macro-Economics class at Sam Houston State University and the rest was history. Law school no more, Business and Economics for me.

That doesn’t change the fact that I vividly remember looking at the screen and watching the President. I remember looking around the airport and adults were all focused on what he was saying. It was an amazing moment that I will never forget, seeing the power of one man, a man who stopped people in their tracks when he spoke.

Like President Bush I wasn’t born in Houston but I do call it my home. I’m proud to have shared a city with him, him and his wife. Watching her funeral earlier this year was sad, tears were shed and it was heartbreaking to see the President without his life partner. This week’s services are sure to bring more tears to my eyes as the country honors a man who gave his life for the good of our people.

I wished I would have gotten to meet President and Mrs. Bush. I’ve heard how nice they were. My heart felt sincerest condolences goes out to the entire Bush family. I hope that I can find a way to make it to visit the President at his church on Wednesday evening.

I wish I had better words to describe the impact he left on a young 7 year old girl back in Kansas City … but I just can’t muster anymore than I have.

Rest in Peace President Bush – your impact on our world will be felt for many more generations to come.

Saturday, November 17, 2018

A New Hope - A Stem Cell Journey

As a person who suffers from chronic issues I am like many out there, always searching for that cure that takes away the pain. In early August, while I was at a stop light, a teenager backed into my car. It was a minor accident with unexpected results.

In 2009, while I was on one of my fitness kicks, I ended up needing back surgery on my L5 & S1. Talk about a pain, wowzers. But once the surgery happened and the bone fragment was removed, I was all better. I had fallen while in the middle of a ‘boot camp’ running course. Well, as you know, once you have back pains it is easy to become reinjured and that’s what happened.

I don’t completely understand the mechanics of kinetic energy and the transference of it but what I do know, my back and shoulder hurt after my car took a rocking when the kid backed into me. My right shoulder was killing me, I was laying on the horn with my arm extended fully on impact. Looking back I can see why that was a dumb decision, I should have been more relaxed and maybe the impact wouldn’t have jarred me so much.

Two and a half months later I’m at the point in my recovery that it’s either surgery to repair the herniated disc that happened or live with the pain. The law firm that I hired suggested I try stem cells.

Not sure if you all know much about stem cells but that is something that my husband and I have researched. I first really got interested in it after hearing a Joe Rogan podcast with Mel Gibson when they were discussing how it has helped them or their family members. I knew about the controversy of it with embryos and abortions but what I didn’t know was all the different ways you could actually acquire them.

And that’s where this new journey begins. When it was suggested I said absolutely, I don’t want anymore surgeries. Remember I am just 18 months out of my hysterectomy which took a large toll on my body. Not to mention I am the mom of a special needs son who requires a lot of my attention. I don’t have the capacity to be down for any length of time.

I went into my consultation with the orthopedic surgeon who administers the stem cells on a Tuesday. He was informing me of the different successes he personally has felt by the stem cells and some of the others he has witnessed. Once the exam was done and all of the questions were answered they went to get the infusion.

The doctor told me that the auto-immune issues I suffer from should have healing results within 72 hours and my back would take 3 weeks to 6 months to heal. I was game, this sounded like a miracle. But like any medical instant gratification I was skeptical. I’ve suffered from chronic pain for so long sometimes it’s hard to remember what life without pain is like. But, I’m always up for an attempt.

The infusion took twenty minutes, and fifteen of them were trying to find a vein. It was painless and very easy. Then I went home. I felt a little high about an hour afterwards. I’ve not been high in real life so it was what I assumed being high felt like. It is really hard to explain but I told my husband I just felt odd.

When I woke up the next morning, I felt significantly less pain. It was like wow, this has to be a placebo, no way it worked this fast. Within 48 hours I was virtually pain free. It was amazing. Here is a list of all the things that I noticed changing within the first FOUR days.

- My lower back pain has been reduced at least 90%. I still have some twinges of pain when I move wrong but, I am not in constant pain. When the pain does hit, it vanishes just as quick as it came.

- My sleep has improved. Probably because my back isn’t in pain. The past month (prior to the infusion) I had to take steroids when I woke up in order to function and move around. Because the disc are pressing on nerves. It’s been two and a half week’s and I have only taken 1 5MG steroid. I was taking 10-15/day for a while there just to ease the pain, not get rid of it.

- My right wrist, as you may know or may not, in the 90’s I was in Martial Arts. Which included board breaking. Well I was as stubborn then as I am now and didn’t always follow my instructors advice. During board breaking with a palm heel strike I choose to not listen. My right wrist has hurt ever since, for TWENTY years. Within 48 hours it was PAIN FREE!

- When I woke up Saturday, just 4 days after, I thought I was crazy. I’ve had double vision damn near my whole life. It’s gone. I mean, there is a touch of it still, but it isn’t noticeable at all. My glasses have prism’s inside them and now I can’t wear them because they hurt my eyes too much. I had issues with my eyes auto-focusing and now that seems gone too. I do still feel like the astigmatisms  is there. My eyes feel like they still need some assistance I just can’t go in yet to see how much. Because I can tell they are still changing.

- My Eye Thyroid Disease, an auto-immune disorder, feels way less. I no longer am experiencing the pressure around my eyes. I don’t have the constant need to apply pressure to ease the tension in my eyebrows or just over my eye lids. It’s crazy.

- Sjogren Syndrome, another auto-immune disease, seems better. This causes dry eyes and dry mouth. If anyone of you ever ate with me you would know the amount of water I generally consume in a meal is easily 4-5 large cups. I easily drank 160 ounces of water a day. Over the last week (remember I’m at 2.5 weeks out now) I can tell a major decrease in my water craving. I also notice my eyes seem to not be as dry. Which is such a relief!

- Rheumatoid Arthritis pain in my joints is gone. You heard me, gone. My left ankle has been giving me non-stop problems since April 2017 and now, nothing. Thank God! My left foot and right wrist have been a constant pain which of course required horrible medication for. I gained almost 60 pounds on the RA medication in 4 months. So now I am just praying I can reverse all that with this infusion seeming to have helped the RA so much.

There has been one unexpected consequence from the stem cells that I am working to fix. My eyes now have a different pain, pain from the light. It’s like they are very very sensitive and I didn’t see that coming. My glasses had transition lenses so they protected me from the sun or other bright lights. Now because I can’t wear them my eyes are left exposed. My husband bought me some very nice sunglasses with that wonderful UV protection which instantly eased the pain. Now if I could just walk around indoors wearing them without looking crazy I’d be all set.

This has truly been a wild experience. I went in for help with my lower back and not only did I receive it, but I had so many other happy windfalls of side effects. What a gift!

What really has me complexed about all of this though is, why isn’t it covered under insurance to begin with? Just think if we could all get an infusion of this to help aid in the cure of so many different things, it would save thousands of dollars.

I will never understand the insurance world, and I don’t know that I want to. They would rather profit than see people succeed. This stem cell treatment, it’s a success. I can’t wait to see how my back feels in a month or two more months. It would be wonderful to not have those shooting nerve pains racing down my left leg. Or the need to flinch every time I stand up. 90% relief is a huge thing, but I guess time will tell if I can get to 100%.

I am going to document this journey because I think it’s important for people to know what options they have out there. Because people suffer daily, and maybe this could help.

The Doctor’s name is Dr. Henry Small - here is his website.  

Monday, September 24, 2018

Happy Birthday Blood Purple!

6 years ago today I became an officially published author. It was a huge deal for me to accomplish this, as it would be for anyone. My parents joined me for dinner that night to celebrate along with my hubby & two of my best friends. The writing community had welcomed me and it was the beginning. The beginning of my dreams coming true. It was by far one of the most memorable moments in my life, right up there with my wedding day, my children's adoption day, my graduation days, and the day I received my black belt in martial arts.

When moments happen in life that change you forever, you tend to remember those. Writing had always been an outlet for me, that wasn't anything new. The new part was letting the world read my writings, letting my work become judged, putting myself out there, exposed.

It's kind of like having that nightmare where you show up to school naked, everyone points and laughs. That's sort of what I was afraid of, when releasing BLOOD PURPLE. I was petrified I would be shunned.

I didn't understand why I had such trouble in English growing up. Grammar, spelling, conjugating sentences, you name it, I sucked. But what I could do was write a hell of a good story. I was very creative. In my debate class I wrote original oratory and the best part, no grammar involved as it was a speech. I loved it and I really enjoyed the whole process. I look at my writing sort of like that. The main difference is people DO see the written words this time around.

But, I took the risk. I sent my manuscript off. The first company I sent it to was an England based publisher who liked it, but didn't publish books in the genre I wrote so they suggested I find a small press who did. I next sent it to a small publishing house in Canada. I ended up contracting 3 books with them before it was over.

If I knew then what I knew now, I would still choose to not go into indie publishing straight away. I learned a lot signing with two publisher's. I ended up actually having 4 books total with small press before I went completely indie. Both publishers taught me something different and I am glad that I had that opportunity to learn.

The Faces Of Blood Purple

My debut novel has had a couple face lifts. I remember when I was emailed the original cover, I cried. I had thought it was the coolest thing since sliced bread! haha. Oh what did I know back then, I sold a lot that first month so hey, guess it had something right!

I have always had an affinity for swords and in my mind this book was represented best by my weapon of choice. I was once asked if I had any sword training in my martial arts and I hate that the answer is no. I would love to someday acquire sword training, if nothing, just to say I could do it.

Don't get me started on the idea of making my own sword, oh boy! One day my hubby will have his own forge shop for stuff like this, once we can retire on my novel revenue, LOL. Then I will make the KADIN sword.

I can picture it perfectly in my mind ...

When I separated with XOXO Publishing I had asked a friend who did graphic art to help make a cover. As you can see, once again, the sword is present.

"I'm not just a princess, I am a warrior." I love that quote. It gave me shivers when I wrote it the first time and every time I read it since then I still feel the goosebumps. Nikole in so many ways was me. Is me.

She's flawed, she's doubtful, she's scared. But she is also strong, loyal and willing to do what it takes to survive.

She's a warrior.

I love her, and everything about this character.

Many times in a books life cycle there comes a time when the author needs to re-brand. My sales had sort of died off and I wanted to change all of my covers. This time the sword came back to the focal point, and the blood, I love the blood.

The cover is similar yet different and I think it catches the eye.

This has been the cover I've used longest and yep, you've guest it, it's time for a new cover to come out.

That probably won't happen for a while as life is pretty hectic right now and I don't exactly know what all I want in it. I toss ideas back and forth in my head but I am sure you know the one thing that will for sure be present.

The sword.

When it's all said and done BLOOD PURPLE is at the core of my writing. I cut my teeth on the Algula world and there is nothing I would change about the characters or the stories. I think they are perfect as is.

I would however change some of the editing jobs that transpired back in 2012 but at some point you have to just accept, this was a first novel, there are mistakes. That's one thing as an indie author, I control the editing. With the publisher the editing went kind of haywire and I know that there are still issues left over from that first job.

But that's okay. I feel like the story can still stand on it's own, especially compiled with the other three books in the series. So I just have let it go.

Happy Birthday BLOOD PURPLE! You launched my writing career, you gave me something to be proud of as an adult, and you continue to give me courage to write, as often as I can.

One day you will be a household name, like Anne Rice, Twilight & True Blood. But until then, just know, you will always be my favorite set of characters, deep in my heart.

To Nikole, Zayn, Leigh, Haydar, Derrik, Dominic, Alec, Adara, Nasir & Mehmet - Happy 6 Years of literary life. Here's to another 6 more! Maybe by then you will all be on the big screen and then who knows what will happen from there.

If you haven't already checked out the Blood Series you can click the link below, happy readings! BLOOD PURPLE ebook is ALWAYS Free ....

Pick Me Up Here!

Tuesday, September 18, 2018

New Release Day: The Ones Who Lived

Order your Copy Here

Anthony and Amelia are regular teens with regular issues, that is, until one day after school they arrive home to find their lives are changing forever. No one knows what causes it, but all of the adults are dead. The only ones left are the young and teenagers. Together, with the help of their best friend Sam and his cousin Sunny, they have to learn to survive and make it through to the next day.

What will happen when their new community is under attack and they have to learn to trust complete strangers? The Ones Who Lived will either come out alive or die fighting.

Hey there! Once again it's release day and this new series, The Ones, is quite different! This is my 20th published completed story and my 23rd story. I cannot believe I have written so much in just 7 years!!

My daughter had asked me to create a story for her, and since she is a teen, I went with Young Adult. For the most part the only YA I read is dystopian and one thing I always wondered, what happens when the apocalypse actually starts? We all have read the stories where they take place years into the future of the dystopian culture, but I have never read that moment when it all happened.

Last year my family vacationed in Saint Pete's Florida to visit my cousin who was graduating high school. It was on this trip that my husband and I started tossing around ideas for the game plan on how a bunch of adults were going to become killed off.

Let me tell you, there was quite the debate going through our little clan on why the adults would die. I'm not going to spoil it for you as you gotta read the book to find out what the actual killing catalyst is, but I can tell you, my hubby was crazy with his ideas.

I will give you this much, my hubby wanted the cause of death to be sex. Mind you, this was meant to be a YA book, so how would I get a bunch of kids to read it if I was promoting 'sex kills'? Craziness. Anyway ....

Lucky for the reading audience I can safely say SEX is not the cause of death! Whew!

There is no secret that witch craft is among the topic in this world. You find out quickly that one of the main characters is a witch! What we don't know, including me the author, is how deep into the witch craft this series will take us. I haven't decided yet. I love bad guys, as many of you already know. Part of me really wants book 2 to be a 'bad guy' book which would then let us explore all about the coven's we see in the epilogue. Who knows what will happen, certainly not me!

You all know I am a pantser and any idea of 'planning' makes me uncomfortable! So the next in the series will just have to be a surprise for all of us.

What I really loved about writing this story was the challenges it gave me. I wanted to make sure it was 'easy' enough for teens to read without making the topics too far over their heads. I also needed to make it 'clean'. Which, if you know my writing, sex and cussing typically come up in  a lot of my fiction. The worst word I use is 'crap' and if I remember right only a handful of times. There are a couple, and I mean just a couple, of kissing scenes. My daughter says there needs to be more romance in book 2!

But this was very much geared towards the younger reading population, I would say 7th through 12th grade mostly. That doesn't mean adults won't enjoy it. Each of the Beta Readers who gave me feedback all were very pleased with the story and how everything fell into place. One reader told me she didn't think it was a YA novel because it could apply to anyone. So that was very good feedback, I wanted to make sure everyone could attach to the characters.

I am hoping to start book two by January or February that way it can release again in September. That's the only plan I have currently, we will see how it goes!

I can't wait for all of you to go out and read it, tell me your thoughts! It really is a lot of fun and I know you will enjoy it.

See you all soon!

P.S. If you want a signed print copy I have a few more left from the Pre-Orders, I'll be placing another order in the next week or so. You can email me at: Hardback Orders will be $18.99 plus $3 media mail shipping and Paperback orders will be $8.99 plus $3 media mail shipping (US & US Territories Only for $3).

Thursday, September 13, 2018

A History Lesson

Tuesday night I asked my daughter, “You know about 9/11 right” and her response broke my heart. She had no idea at all, 14 in 8th grade, and no clue about what thrust the U.S.A. into the war on terror. Last night I asked my son the same question and his reply, more accurate than hers, “That’s what started our war right” made me realize that I needed to do some serious history lessons at home.

Both kids sat down with me and I pulled up a Youtube video of one of the ABC news posts right after the first plane hit the tower. I watched them absorb the newscast. It was a seven minute long video that ended with the second plane attacking. We pulled up the next video, plane #2.

Next, we watched Alan Jacksons, “Where were you” video.

Sierra shed tears, she looked up at me and asked, “Mom, why would anyone do that?”

How do I even answer that when I don’t fully understand it myself? I told her, “Because the terrorist, they hate America and everything we stand for. Freedom, rights, and equality. Everything our flag stands for.”

Aaron reached his arm out and grabbed my left hand. He held onto it as the song kept playing. When the music ended no one said anything for two or three minutes.  Aaron quietly said, “Why would they kill themselves as a bomb?”

“I don’t know Aaron, they think it’s what God wants.”

Sierra’s hazel eyes looked up from the screen to look at me, tears coating her lashes, “God doesn’t want people to kill for him!”

“No Sierra, he doesn’t.”

Why hadn’t they learned about this before? Why wasn’t it discussed in schools? I did a Google search asking that exact question and apparently in Texas it’s left until High School to get into the deep topic of 9/11 and terrorism.

How is this not part of “American History” in 8th grade? We teach about WW1 & WW2 in 7th grade Texas History, why not 9/11 in American History?  Or why isn’t it discussed more when religion is taught? I remember my daughter learning about different religions around the world and how they all interact with one another in her 6th grade social studies class. Shouldn’t they teach about the downfalls to extreme religions (any religion) and what perceptions can cause? How religion at the base is a good thing but all good things can be used as a weapon if abused?

My kids asked what I was doing when 9/11 happened. I remember it like yesterday.

I was in my dorm room at Sam Houston State University asleep. My roommate was in our bathroom getting ready for her 1st period class, I think it was biology, and I was just starting to wake up. The news was on, the twin towers were on the screen and smoke was burning. Just as I cleared my eyes I saw the second plane hitting the tower, fire engulfing those floors.

I will never forget where I was, but I can’t believe children don’t really know about this event at all. Their entire lives have been framed in the 9/11 era.

Students are growing up in the world of Arab/Muslim hate, ‘Muslim Ban’s’ or however else you want to frame it. And they don’t even understand why the word “Muslim” is even a hot button or how Isis even came to be. Why are our soldiers in the Middle East? Why do young men and women come home injured or worse, gone from this life?

Because of 9/11. Because of decisions we made shortly after those attacks. Because of decisions we made before 9/11.

Because of hate.

My question is, if people are so scared of history repeating itself, why aren’t our students taught about it more? Taught on what hate, racism, sexual bias lead to?

This just makes me sad, makes my heart cry.

It has been a while since I composed a blog and I thought today I needed to. I needed my outlet to let my feelings flow.

It makes me sad my kids don’t know about the history of my country, a country I love. A country my grandfather’s proudly served in, a country I proudly call mine. I don’t want my children growing up thinking Muslim’s are bad. I have friends that are Muslim’s and every one of them are wonderful human beings, just like my friends who are Jewish or Wiccan and agnostic. If I don’t want my children growing up and potentially following someone’s footsteps of hate I need to make sure I am teaching them about the past.

9/11 wasn’t history for me, but I am starting to see how it has become history now.

Next on my list is December 7th. I’ll be teaching them about Pearl Harbor and how America stepped into WWII officially because of the bombs. And what that lead to, the destruction of so many lives.

We have to teach these kids history … we have to stop the hate. How do we keep our precious babies safe? When you have that answer please let me know.

Saturday, July 7, 2018

Another Fad .... Giving Up All Sugar

Well it’s that time again ... the time when I roll my eyes at the effort, results and overall well being of the attempt that was given at healthy living. Long time followers of the blog know that auto-immune issues plague my system and that makes life super super hard when it comes to weight management.

People look at someone who is overweight, especially women, and think they are lazy or they must over eat or that they just don’t care. Well I am going to run through with you what I consume on a typical day and you can tell me if you think I am over eating.

Breakfast - 2-3 eggs either scrambled with cheese or hard boiled along with a banana
Morning snack - String cheese
Lunch - 1 serving of lunch meat (6 slices) I take those slices and break them into 2’s and roll them with a slice of Colby jack cheese. I also have 1-2 small orange (cuties) and then another string cheese. 2 ounces of peanut butter and 1/2 a cup of baby carrots
Afternoon snack (or at lunch if I am super hungry) - Another fruit, either strawberries (5 of them), peach, plums, nectarine, etc.
Dinner - I serving of meat and 1-2 vegetable servings. If one of the servings is a potato I never add rice to the meat dish. If I want rice with the meat I have two non - starch veggies (carrots, green beans, broccoli, peas, etc.)
I also drink 140-160 ounces of water a day.

So tell me ... is that too much food? Am I over eating? Sometimes if I am feeling really daring I will add a vanilla pudding at lunch just for fun. My co-worker thinks I am starving myself with this food intake, he thinks I’m crazy.

This has been my exact diet for idk, maybe 3 months now. Keep in mind I’ve done the 100% gluten free, 100% processed sugar free, 100% vegan, 100% vegetarian and now this adaptation ... I try to limit my gluten to eating out since I dont really buy it at home except for bread for the kids. I also don’t drink milk. The only milk I get is in the cheese. I’m down 10 pounds total and that is including all the crappy meds the docs shove inside me to assist with weight loss.

People can call it excuses all they want but life is hard for someone with all these auto immune diseases. In all the diets what I do know has helped me actually feel better are two diets, the gluten free and the insulin-resistance diet. And that diet is super easy to follow. It is all about balance. If you have 1 serving of carbs you have at least 1 serving of protein to balance it out with and no more than 2 servings of carbs per meal. I try to follow that 100% of the time. Which is why I always have cheese with my fruit. And when I say servings I mean legit servings. I measure so much out. And your protein : carb ratio has to be 7:30.

So now my husband and one of my best friends have challenged me to go 14 days at 100% sugar free. That means no fruit. I am pretty sure I may die and suffer a painful death from this. Not because there is no cookies or no Dr Pepper or any of that ... but because I can’t have my fruit! As you can see I am getting in 3-4 servings of fruit a day and it is a true staple in my life. Now I will have to give that up.

I am tired of all the medications I have to take and I am willing to try anything to see if it helps me. My husband went sugar free and lost 50 pounds really quickly and my friend doing this is at almost 30 pounds now and she looks great.

So I am going to give this fad a try for 14 days starting Monday. I told her I am probably going to end up super bitchy over this ... so we will see.

So my meals are going to look like this .... blah!
Breakfast - 2-3 boiled eggs
Snack - string cheese
Lunch - meat & cheese roll, celery, cream cheese for dipping,
Snack - ?
Dinner - meat with green beans or broccoli or spinach & more cheese.

This is gonna suck! Guess we will see how this comes out.

I realize I can also make salads with this, like ground beef, lettuce, cheese, hard boiled egg, etc. But we’ll go one day at a time.

I’m curious if any of you have ever done something like this and what your results were?

Leave a message if you have with how it went.

Good luck to all of you who have this FAD issue too. We’re all in this together.

Happy Readings and I’ll talk to you all on the flip side.

Monday, June 25, 2018

Why I Want My Gov’t To Succeed

All night I have been trying to get my brain to turn on to write for my current WIP. The only thing I was at all inspired to write was this blog. I fought it for hours. Literally 3. I have had mental and verbal arguments with myself over this topic and it always boils down to one simple truth.

If our gov’t fails, we all fail.

Why would anyone want that? I don’t understand it. 

I remember a time not to long ago when people could have open debates on either side of the isle and at the end of the day still remain friends. Now I feel like I am living in a world where I have to censor what I say, even around family. People who are supposed to love you unconditionally. Is that the America you want to live in? It certainly isn’t what I want to live in.

I get it ... the left HATES President Trump. The right ... they want to cut social welfare programs and that makes them cruel, they want to lock our borders up, that makes them heartless, and every item of clothing, scrap of hair or molecule they breathe in from the air is scrutinized.

As a child I wanted to grow up to be President. I dreamt of the day I would toss my hat into politics. I was so naive that I had no clue what I would be asking for if I actually followed that dream.

Thank God I Didn’t.

I remember in my senior year at Clear Brook High School in Friendswood Texas my Gov’t teacher was talking about the Clintons. The big sex scandal was still a hot topic and everyone was talking about THE DRESS! My gov’t teacher made a comment that has stuck with me for many many years. He said that the whole world was laughing at us over the President having a mistress. Not that he has one but that American’s are so bent out of shape over sex and scandals that we make things blow up over nothing.

That was in 2000. 

Well now 18 years later and our country is even worse than we were back then. The media makes our leaders look pathetic. They are seemingly more concerned with shocking and eye catching headlines than actual facts. Fake news is on a rapid increase and real legit news sources are on a decline.

And worst, the world is laughing harder. This time they look at us and want to protect their citizens from us. A country that used to be a center for hope is now an image of terror because they never know where our political moods are going to take them.

YES, I VOTED FOR TRUMP! Go ahead and unfollow, unfriend or whatever. That’s fine. Do I agree with everything he’s done, no, I never agree with republicans 100%. My first election ever I voted for John Kerry. I never vote straight ticket, I always vote on merit. I couldn’t vote for Clinton so there you have it.

But just because I don’t like President Trump’s twitter wars that doesn’t mean I dont want to still support him. He’s my president. He’s the leader of my country. Of course I support him. You can disagree with him  and still support him. Because if he wins, I win. If his presidency is positive I’ll be ahead, I’ll win too. 

I told my husband today that it’s been 17 years since 9/11. I think a majority of the country has forgotten what it was like waking up to those twin towers on fire. I vividly remember it. My roommate Brittani was in the bathroom blow drying her hair. The TV was on and I woke up just as the second plane ran into the second tower. The smoke was steaming from the building and the news was going crazy.

I picked up the phone and called my friend James. He was asleep and when I got him to answer he told me not to be gulable, that someone was joking with me. But no, there was no joke. It happened. James and I drove home to Friendswood that weekend and on our drive through Houston we saw a Southwest sign that said “Non stop flights to NYC starting 9/11” But that didn’t happen, the airports had all shut down. 

My dad’s coworker was supposed to be in one of the buildings that crashed, near the floor of the sites. His child had gotten sick and he had missed his flight. I went to college with a guy from Boston who lost friends in the attack. Days and days of coverage lasted with the dust and debris, the image of people jumping out of buildings just to try and live. 

Death, destruction, hatred. 9/11 was real, it was horrible, and it could happen again. 

Do you know how many threats the gov’t has to stop every day, week, month or year to keep this generation of students from waking up to another attack on that scale?

I was an intern at a congressman’s office through my political science program. I went to an FBI Task Force meeting where they talked about the terroist infiltrating a food plant facility that made MRE’s for our troops and poisoning them. Terrorist from the Arab countries sneaking across the border as Hispanics. Legit, real threats that happened in 2003.

What makes you think that’s stopped? You know it hasn’t. It’s only gotten worse because technology has gotten more sophisticated. 

I remember 9/11. I remember my friends of Arab nationalities that weren’t as lucky as me. My skin isn’t dark, my name is Ashley, can’t get more white than that. But I had friends who had darker skin, names that are hard to pronounce. I remember their lives changing forever because now everyone instantly hated them.

I remember the cleaners near my middle school getting vandalized multiple times because someone from Pakistan owned it.

I remember, do you?

The terrorist are real, the threats are real. They happen in England, France and other places in the world. What if we are next?

Yes our country is made up of immigrants- well mostly. We do have the Native American’s who we stole everything from that truly have the rightful claim to our land still to consider. But yes, we are made up of people seeking protection.

My great grandfather Sam came here from Lebanon. He came through Ellis Island. He came at the turn of the century and he worked very hard to save enough money to bring my great grandmother here. They were immigrants. My step family are immigrants. My friends are immigrants. I have nothing against immigration. 

So long as it’s legal.

I hear you, the argument is they are escaping from violence. Okay, so we need to push reform and better vetting process, that’s fine I’m all on board with that. But we don’t need to push for open borders. We need to scrutinize anyone who sets foot on our soil because what if you’re next.

What if you’re on the next flight that gets hijacked and you find out it’s heading for the Pentagon. You have to take down the terrorist. 

What would you do? Would you give your life selflessly to protect our country? Or would you sit there bitching and moaning that we should have had tougher borders for protection.

Everything our country is, everything we work towards, everything we are. You're willing to throw that all away just to get President Trump impeached? I don’t get it, I don’t understand. Why?

If he wins, we win. 

It’s a trickle down affect. 

I read tonight that 1 million jobs have been created this year, 1 million. Why aren’t we celebrating this?

I don’t understand the political climate today, and I don’t think I want to. I know this post went long over board and I mean I can do that, it’s my blog. But I hope at least one or two lines got you to think.

If everyone who is out there crying out that deportation isn’t humanitarian I challenge you. Go out there and bring a homeless man woman or child into your home and leave him or her there for 20 days. See how it feels for you. See if you can help change their life. Take care of your fellow countryman.

Or I challenge you to look at the foster children. 100,000 children with no parents. You want to help go be one of those children’s mom or dad. It was the best decision my Hubby and I ever made. Put your money where your mouth is and help AMERICANS who are without the basic love of a family.

Maybe you can do it, maybe you can’t. Only you will be able to tell.

To sum it up ... remember this ... for you to succeed your country has to succeed. For that to happen, our president has to succeed. 

So the next time you’re out there bashing the President I want you to think about something ... is this bettering me? If the answer is yes ignore me, but if it isn’t ... think about it.

We should want our gov’t to win ... that’s the only way we will win too.

That’s it, I’m done with my ramble ... carry on among you’re lives.