The Night It All Became Clear....

The Night It All Became Clear.....

I have intentionally not blogged at all in the past few months because what’s going on in my house right now is extremely private and very hard in so many ways. When I started the adoption journey I had some idea of what to expect but I was still extremely clueless on certain aspects.

Last night, October 28^th, was most likely one of the best nights of my life. And that’s saying a lot.

 

It wasn’t the finalization of the adoption, nothing of major importance happened, but, it was a major moment in my heart.

 

I’ve been sick for about a week now and when I got home I was feeling majorly weak. Work had worn me down, and I had a headache. The moment I walked across my threshold of my home the dogs started barking, the kids were noisy and my husband looked like he needed a break. My brother and his wife had been out of town for a week so we had been babysitting my puppy-nephew Parker. Whom is the most adorable puppy ever. So Ry already told me he would be stopping by the house to pick up Parker so I knew that soon my house would be crowded with more bodies.

 

(I’m not going to say the kiddos names so lets just call them A & S.) I quickly got my son, A, and asked if he wanted to help me make dinner. We had grilled chicken over salad. He of course said yes because he loves helping me cook. Maybe one day he will be a chef! We had started cutting up the lettuce and carrots when S came into the kitchen and told me she wanted to make her daddy a necklace. After explaining that daddy probably won’t wear a necklace she decided she would make it anyway. So there she is, sitting at the kitchen table putting beads on a string when the doorbell rings.

 

The dogs go crazy and so do the kids. Everyone but Tony and I run to the front door to welcome the aunt and uncle in. The kids go wild, Parkers barking and jumping and Toto and Doogie were running crazy.

 

Life was perfect.

 

My sis in law, we will call her Mar, comes up to me and hugs me and then tells me how much she and Ry missed the kids and how they talked about them non-stop with her family. And its only been 96 days (today) with the kiddos and already everyone is attached. She then tells me how they are always thinking how they should get this or that for the kids and how they ARE coming over Saturday to spend Halloween with their niece and nephew. And of course Tony and I! How easily we are forgotten it seems lol.

 

Once they leave its just the 6 of us again. Life calms down and A and I finish cooking, well preparing a salad. We all sit down to a family dinner where the kids talk about their day, we laugh, say our prayers and go about having a wonderful family dinner.

 

Now its time for Dad to go to bed, which normally is an uneventful experience. Except tonight … S breaks the news … the night I thought the television was possessed by a ghost it was really Dad playing a trick on me with an app on his phone … and now its on.

 

Tony and the kids then precede one at a time to laugh and play and goof off for a good 15 minutes. It was so loud! My head was KILLING me. But it was the best moment of my life. I sat at the table watching Tony play with each of the kids. Chase them around the house. Watch the kids jump on him, punch him and tease at him.

 

And it was in this moment that I ‘knew’ everything will be okay. Everything that we’ve had to learn to grow through, cope with and learn to manage was worth this moment. Because this is family. This is what its like….being a mom.

 

And there is absolutely nothing more exciting or important to me than being a mom.

And since I can't yet post pics of my kids here's a pic of the dogs!