Adoption is a blessing and a curse. In so many ways the good outweighs any negative, but the negative seems suffocating at times. Without going into all the personal details of my children’s world we had an encounter two and a half weeks ago, you could say, with the bio-mother. God - I never knew fear like I did on the 21st.
When your child is away from you, missing, for any amount of time, your world collapses. The night and following day is like a blur to me now. If I didn’t vividly remember every moment my son was missing, I may have thought it was simply a nightmare and didn’t really happen. But, for a few hours, my world just was destroyed.
But after the collapse you start to rebuild, and part of rebuilding with adopted children, special needs to be specific, comes to police/legal response. Now I have said since the day we moved into my little town inside of Houston, I love the police department, the people, everyone, in my city. I never want to leave, the support and compassion is unmatched.
But where is that support from Harris County?
On top of being my children’s adopted parents, we are also legal guardians of our son, who is special needs. This means that now that he is 18 he still has to receive help, like a lot of special needs families experience. Which means he cannot decide where he lives without our guidance and approval.
So when this bio-mother takes your ‘legal ward’ away from you, you would think that’s kidnapping. Since she is denying us access. But apparently, according to the Harris County District Attorney’s office, it is not. It seems the DA just picks and chooses which court orders to enforce and which laws to charge regardless of what the legal documents say.
How the hell are we supposed to keep our children safe when the court system is against us?
For some perspective - bio-mother is on probation from drug charges from prison, not to mention she lost her parental rights because she was an abusive monster to her own children.
So I asked, “Why does a druggie on parole get more protection than my son?” And the officer didn’t have any answer for me as to why the courts can’t help.
Not to mention that this monster didn’t serve a day of time for the neglect, abuse and torture she put my children through. Why didn’t she? Well when I asked this question 4 years ago I got “Because children are unreliable witnesses”.
How is this right? We have all of these social justice warriors out there fighting for rights of certain parts of the population who are overlooked and left to suffer, but what about my son? Why am I (and my husband) the only ones able to advocate for him? The officer told me “You can try Montgomery County since the bio-mother crossed county lines, maybe they will help you.”
I spoke with a Montgomery County sheriff’s officer yesterday afternoon. I will have to go up in person and file the claim, which I am going to do. But even he told me it’s a crapshoot on if their DA will take the charges. But that I had a better shot with them than I did with Harris County.
WHY IS IT OKAY FOR THAT TO BE THE CASE? WHY CAN’T HARRIS COUNTY GIVE A DAMN ABOUT PEOPLE’S RIGHTS AND PROTECT THEIR CITIZENS?
I am so tired, so damn tired, of the ‘left’ claiming they are the party of the people. No they are the party of the spotlight. Because if they were truly the party of the people then when a legally disabled, partially incapacitated adult is taken from his home against his guardians wishes and left on the side of the highway, you press charges!
I don’t care if you are republican or democrat or a tea party or an extremist- protect the citizens who can’t protect themselves!
When I called the DA’s office to see about a protective order, here is what happened. It’s been a week now since I filed the application (I had to wait on the police report number before I filed) and the email reply I got was “someone will contact you in 2-3 weeks to hear your case” when I asked “what happens when it’s accepted” her reply was “cases that are approved right now are on the docket for December, so maybe January or February you will get to go to trial”. Really? 4-6 months to get a legal form to protect my children from this monster? WHAT HAPPENS IN THE MEAN TIME????
Where is the justice for my children? Where is the justice for all children who are abused or disabled and in the same situation as my son?
Where is the parades of people telling the DA to fight for their right?
Nowhere ... because they are just part of the system and only their family members care enough to fight.
District Attorney Kim Ogg - I didn’t vote for you before and I will never vote for you. Your website spouts all this pride about the things you have done for victims but I haven’t seen your office protect the victims living in my home that I have loved and cared for for the last five years. You may have done a few good deeds but from what I can tell, your office clearly only cares about easy cases.
I may not have as large of a media presence as actors in Hollywood, but I do have a small social platform. And I truly feel like this is a fight worth fighting. People should know what their DA does out of the limelight, how their DA leaves disabled adults in situations that could turn life threatening.
As I started this piece out about adoption I will close it with adoption. It’s hard. It’s tiring. It’s rough. But it’s worth it. Because these two individuals who have stolen my heart will always have a place to call home with a family who will love them unconditionally. And even through society let them down, I never will. I’ll always fight for them. Anyway I can.